Not my iphone

Something happened today that I wanted to share.

So the story started a while ago- maybe a year. Settle in by the way- this may be a biggie!!

I so wished for an iphone. My journal at the time stated that I would love to download all the beautiful and inspirational apps from Hay House and sync my calendar with my MacBook Air.

I dreamed of holding it in my hand and having the world at my fingertips all day, everyday.

It was a bit of an obsession of mine really. I knew deep down that it wouldn't like be the best thing that had ever happened to me but pretty high up on my list of really awesome cool stuff to own.

So I looked at getting one in NZ and at the time couldn't justify the price of it especially when we didn't know if we would be staying here for 2 whole years (of a contract). So I decided against it. I was sad :(

So a year goes by and my old little phone decides to die a death and we still aren't completely sure at that point we would be staying put. So I got one of the crappiest phones as it was cheap and I still couldn't justify the price in NZ of an iphone (had I still been in Oz, I woulda been on a plan that made it very affordable) but the reality was, I wasn't there. I was here.

So life with my crappy little phone (it's coolest feature is....a torch), was a bit embarrassing. I didn't want to be someone who was embarrassed about having a crappy phone. Whilst everyone tapped away checking their calendar for when we could meet at networking gigs. I would tell them, let me email you when I get home. "Well what's your calendar like?" they would ask me....Emmmmmmmm

So you see, when I knew we were staying here for the forseeable future, I said to my beloved, "I think now is the time..." To which he replied "Absolutely."

So I was told the rates for the phone and I said, "Whaaaaaaaat, realllllllly, Holy Crap!!!" They were like....expensive. Really expensive, especially when I had just been back to the U.K and seen an ad for an ipad 2 and the latest iphone at the time on a plan for way cheap and no cost for the handset and tablet upfront!!!!

So I decided once again to hang on tight to my crappy little phone :(

So a couple of weeks ago someone I know who works at Vodafone told me there was a cool business deal going and the phone was now 'Amazingly' affordable. I promptly ordered it...iphone 4, 32Gb in white....I even bought a cover in anticipation.

So I waited and waited and checked my Po Box like an obsessed monkey....

Nothing came.

I then got an email yesterday saying the phone had actually arrived at the Vodafone office by mistake......Hmmmmm

So they were going to drop it off for me today....Woop Woop....I was so excited. I would have all of Christmas break....just me and my iphone...lounging in the sun, sipping cocktails and browsing apps and maybe playing the odd game of BubbleBurst (I know this game from my husband's work iphone)...I am kinda addicted.

Anyway...I digress, where was I again...Oh yes...So it was coming this morning and my hubby went down to collect it at the front door...brought it up to the apartment and.......it was an iphone 4S.....WHAT???????

I checked back all of my email correspondence just to make doubly sure that I had in fact ordered the right phone. Yes, I had...phew. The iphone 4S is way more expensive with no discount so I left the cellophane on the box as you an see above and do you know how hard it was for me to do it. I almost said to hubby...Oh, I'll just open it and it was their mistake and I'll just use it and pay them what I was going to pay them. He told me to calm down and just email them. I had a kind of wild crazed look in my eyes now as I wailed on and on about how they could have got it so wrong and I was damn annoyed really.

He waited...and hugged me and told me..."Honey, it's just a phone."

Well, that made me mad...ok, I was already mad but I was calming down after the hug.

So I emailed and politely told them what had happened. I got a phone call, several emails and a kind of promise that the new iphone 4 would be with me tomorrow.

Now, I don't usually fight reality like this or get that upset so I went to do some reflection on why I was so pissed.

Here is what I came up with:

• I find it hard to tolerate incompetence
• I was so looking forward to using my new iphone today
• Things like this have happened before
• Really it went back to how it could have gone wrong

So I said in an email that mistakes happen.

I hopefully will receive the right phone tomorrow as I leave to go up to the coast to spend Christmas with family, then go on a cruise which I would very much like the phone for.

Reflecting back I have realised that when I fight reality, I am the only one who loses out. On the scale of things, it ain't that big a deal. People can make mistakes, things can go wrong. At least I wasn't in surgery getting the wrong limb cut off (I read about that once- horrid).

And as Jon Kabat-Zin says in his book Coming To Our Senses (a great read BTW) "I wound up seduced into a pervasive unawareness."

I was telling myself a story and making me right and others wrong. We are all human, we all make mistakes, it's coming up to Christmas and they likely have soooooo many orders for iphones.

So I am no longer mad. It will show up when it shows up (before or after said cruise) and I will be okay.

I will have time to properly say goodbye to little crappy phone and may even keep him around as a torch...who knows.

So there can be a lesson in something you perceive to be the worst thing in the world. Please don't think though that I am saying 'me not getting my new shiny phone' was in any way the worst thing in the world- I am so NOT saying that. To even have a phone that you can carry about in your pocket is itself an amazing gift...Alexander Graham Bell would have been so proud!

On reflection...on reflection everything is fine....and Vodafone- a Wonderful Company. They even have an Advent Calendar Draw leading up to Christmas and you can win phones and other great stuff...how cool is that?

Settle into the now

Sometimes we get so caught up in the Christmas rush, attending parties, wrapping presents, putting up decorations, shopping, cooking etc.

We forget where we are in all of the madness sometimes.

Whilst reading this post (if you have given yourself the time- it is short) I invite you to settle in the now...this very second. Meet yourself where you are right now...pause...breathe...drop those shoulders that you have been wearing like earrings and simply be......

Smile, place your hand on your heart and make a small promise of finding just one moment in the holiday season to do this very quick but very effective practice for yourself. Even if it means excusing yourself when with family and going to the bathroom to do it.

Your mind and body (not to mention your family- although not knowing it) will thank you for this little 'breather'.

Enjoy the break and celebrate your precious life....

Bless Fest!!

I was thinking today of all the wonderful people I get to work with and what they have shared with me about our journey together. I felt very blessed and so thought I would share this with other people.

Who are the people you have worked with?

Who are the people who inspire and empower you?

Have you told them lately how much them being in your life means to you?

Could you?

It's Christmas- write a testimonial for someone who you think rocks! Give someone a gift to say thank you or a beautiful handwritten note (these days it is all about the Facebook or Twitter and not enough about the handmade cards). Or look/think of some of the lovely things people have said about or to you. Have a bless fest of your very own!

Beautiful words and actions can have a beautiful impact and shares the love around. I am off to write some myself but here are a few people have written to me:

To whom it may concern:

Since engaging Yvonne Anderson as a coach, I have much gained much more clarity around myself and my actions.

The number of ‘ah ha’ moments has been quite remarkable.

Yvonne’s means and methods of enabling me to have self-insight and to then move forward, has been invaluable. Her help has been instrumental in my (at last) finishing off my novel draft, and dispelling my internal belief that I never finish anything.

I thoroughly recommend Yvonne as a guide and prompter of knowledge about that most important person – yourself.

Peter Kerr, Karori, New Zealand

Working with Yvonne allowed me to dedicate an hour of my time to ME! Yes, it sounds insignificant or perhaps even silly but I found that by working with her to focus on myself, learn and then challenge myself, I have finally started to turn that really loooooooong list of things to do into things that are being done. I came into coaching feeling generally happy with most aspects of my life but just wanting to kick it into a higher gear; feeling like something was missing without being able to pin-point what it was. Things I thought were the big issues (like work conflicts, new positions), upon reflection, have paled in significance against far more exciting ventures like travel - fulfilling my childhood dream of getting a one-way ticket to Europe! I also learned there were things in my "happy" basket that I wanted to work on - like how to argue, discuss and debate with my girlfriend, a feisty, passionate and loving partner. Add into that fitting into a pair of jeans I haven't been able to wear for over 6 months and I am now a very happy little camper!!!

K.H, Implementations & Training Manager, IT company, Melbourne

“I came to Yvonne to try and find my life’s passion and along the way managed to learn more about myself than I thought possible. Yvonne’s style is very laid back and I’ve found her to be a great sounding board for many an idea. Her methods and ideas are based on a variety of her own and others practical experiences. This coupled with her sunny personality and great sense of humour has made our sessions extremely rewarding and buckets of fun. She has opened this often very pragmatic personality to a range of new thoughts and ideas, which I have enjoyed immensely……can’t thank her enough or recommend her too highly!

…oh and did I find my life’s passion? You bet I did!”

PB, FAST, a Microsoft Subsidiary, Melbourne

"Yvonne has a way of getting to the heart of what's blocking you in a gentle and loving way and I always felt much stronger and more focused after our sessions. She works very intuitively and I felt very comfortable and safe talking with her about everything I was experiencing, learning so much about myself and my own role in the unhappy life I had created. I think the name "Safe Space Coaching" is perfect for the work Yvonne does, I trusted her straight away as we discussed even my most upsetting experiences with clarity, wisdom and humour. I am very grateful to Yvonne and would highly recommend her as a coach to anyone who is ready to make positive changes in their life. I now consider Yvonne to be a friend."

Abbie Berman, Wellington, New Zealand

I lead quite a stressful life and wanted to see if meditation would help me in any way. I first went to Yvonne to learn about meditation and to see what it could bring to my life. I had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into but when we sat down to first talk about it I found that Yvonne does not base her meditation on 1 religion or 1 correct way of doing it, she informs and teaches you all different methods and whatever works for you is what she sticks with which I think is great!

Her teaching skills are amazing, she is very thoughtful and patient and is very comfortable to be around. The meditations themselves that Yvonne has taught me are just fantastic and have completely changed my life around from being very stressful to being able to control that stress whereas before I didn’t have the tools. I would, and have, highly recommended Yvonne to a lot of people with no doubt in my mind that she will give her all to look after and teach them as she has with me. She is a gifted wonderful person and I am so happy that I have her as a mentor. C.S, Account Manager, Wellington

“Having Yvonne as a coach has been a turning point in my life. She helped me getting in contact with my values, learning to manage my energy, finding awareness; almost every session was a highlight experience!”

Elsa Wohler, Property Manager, New York, USA

“Yvonne was a great support for me during my coaching sessions. With her excellent listening skills, productive feedback and powerful questions she assisted me in clarifying my goals in both my personal life and career then guided me to achieve them. Achieving these goals has given me a renewed confidence and vitality in being able to tackle any other goals I come across.”

Ivana Williamson, Sales Manager, Melbourne, Australia

Get CrEAaTiVe

This is for anyone who wants to quit playing small and start igniting their fire!

I recently purchased Your Big Beautiful Book Plan. When I purchased it I also got a copy of:

I loved them both so much and have found them so very informative, inspirational and brimming with excellence that I became an affiliate for the products. This means that if you click on the links to your right (in the sidebar) I get a wee kickback (which is nice).

Danielle sizzles in style and oozes amazingness to get your creative juices flowing in the Spark Kit and both her and Linda do an amazing job at getting the ideas flowing and awesome insider info for creating book ideas and proposal plans in Your Big Beautiful Book Plan!!

All up, two fantastic kits that cost just $150 each. I tell you...I would have paid more. they were worth every dollar :)

So naturally I want to tell you all about them!!

You can find out more about Danielle LaPorte here. She has amazing blog posts so check her out!!

Celebrate Your 2011

I wanted to talk about achievements.

We spend so much time at the end of a year thinking about how we want the next year to go. Many people start thinking about resolutions they will make for the New Year then beat themselves up when they don't fully commit to what they had planned for themselves. We've all been there at some point I am sure.

We are so busy with this planning stage that sometimes we forget to reflect on all the amazing achievements we had the year just passed. This saddens me as we don't celebrate all the wonderful things we have done. I would greatly encourage us all to do this- CELEBRATE YOU!!!

Take a few minutes to reflect and perhaps write down the answers to the following questions:

• What one thing did I do very well in 2011?
• When was my proudest moment?
• What made others stop and thank me?
• What amazing thing did I do for someone else?
• What was my career highlight?
• What was my personal highlight?
• What change did I make for the better?
• What was something I failed at but learnt something from?
• What opportunity arose for me?
• How many times did I surprise myself?
• What one small moment made me smile?

Now look back over what you have written and simply know that you did your best with what you had and knew and now you can build on these successes with flow in 2012. Now go do something nice for yourself ♥

I usually pick a theme for the year ahead once I celebrate the past year. I usually don't wait till NY to make resolutions or a list of goals, why wait for that date? Celebrate your life in the small moments of beauty...do everything with LOVE and you'll be okay :)

Listen to the whispers of your body

I am beyond thrilled that there are people like Lissa who talk openly about the truth about health. The real truth and what I have seen over and over in my life as a nurse although I could never say it out loud as people looked at me strangely,tutted and shook their heads.

I can say it now though- I believe that everything that goes on in the body (sickness, illness, stress) has got everything to do with how we think and how we are living and showing up in the world.

Heal the old emotional wounds, live fiercely from the heart, be content, be responsible, connect spiritually, leave badness behind you, rid yourself of limiting beliefs and courageously set forth in life with motivation, inspiration, empowerment and positivity and you will thrive.

I am so passionate about this that I am making myself into a living example for my clients.

• Healthy Professional life- Work for self
• Healthy Spiritual life- Meditation, connection to self and others, prayer
• Healthy Financial life- I am sensible with finances whilst still enjoying life
• Healthy Body- I have lost a significant amount of weight this year and exercise 6 days a week & nourish my body with healthy foods
• Healthy Relationships- I am content with my friendships, marriage & family
• Expressing myself creatively- I write, I create projects
• Healthy sex life- Well...I'm not talking about that here :)
• Healthy environment- I live in a rather clean small city
• Mentally healthy- As I said above- I meditate regularly, I also journal, coach myself and surround myself with people who nurture me, I practice gratitude

I am by no means perfect but consider myself a work in progress. I enjoy great health. I live from a place of abundance and love rather than a place of fear.

I may take up some form of art next year to assist me in developing more creative juices!

Please do as Lissa says "Stop doing what you should and start doing what you feel."

Your body and the world will thank you.

Create Your Own Beautiful Reality

How about we create a beautiful reality for ourselves?

My beautiful reality looks a little something like this:

• I don't concern myself with the little things (which used to annoy the H out of me)
• I see things for what they are, not how I would prefer them to be
• I act from a space of pure abundance, not fear
• I choose to work for myself as I need to respect a manager and this is not always possible
• I choose to surround myself with beautiful things- the picture above is a recent gift I gave myself
• I buy beautiful Peonies when I wish to surround myself with oodles of gorgeousness!

• I buy myself little treats that make me ooh and ahh like this gorgeous Raspberry Vanilla cupcake

• I tend to distance myself from people who constantly complain, lower my energy or talk at me instead of with me
• I question my beliefs a lot
• I stay fit and healthy (which allows me to enjoy all these yummy cupcakes)
• I speak gently to myself
• I dance around the house to my favourite music
• I spend heaps of time with people who are vibrating at the same frequency and are open to new ideas
• I aim to learn something new every single day
• I don't judge people
• I keep myself resilient to the stresses in life by meditating, exercising and feeding myself nutrition packed food
• I write in a journal to capture many moment of my life so I can use it as a tool for my own growth
• I aim to assist people in creating their own beautiful reality
• I choose inspiring thoughts instead of reading into disempowering ones
• I have created a safe space in my life- a nook carved out just for me (more on this in later posts- I will have some free stuff on this for readers on my site)
• I practice and actively promote conscious communication
• I respect myself

If you were thinking of your life as a beautiful painting, what would you like to paint there?

Holiday Stress Begone

I think we would be best if we bagged our stresses this holiday season!

I invite you to pull up a mental list of all the things which you are allowing to stress you this festive season.

Here's what a lot of people stress about at this time of year:

• Spending time with family (I am sure there some of your nearest are not your dearest)
• Shopping in crowded retail outlets and shopping malls
• Going to numerous Christmas Parties (some people don't like to party)
• Rushing to get last minute things done at work before you leave for the holidays
• Financial worries (after all little Timmy really wants that expensive .............. this Christmas)
• Writing numerous Christmas Cards and finding that 'just right pressie' for someone
• Trying to squeeze in the gym workouts (after all we all want to look fabulous in our Christmas outfits
• Panic about shopping for the actual Christmas Meal!!
• Will there be enough Milk and Cookies for Santa :)

We can sometimes get ourselves in such a tizzy over all that we must do. But must you really?

Can you simply enjoy the family, shop at night or online, say no to some Christmas invites, delegate at work or allow yourself to leave something off the list, get Timmy something less expensive and tell him about some kids in the world who have nada, send digital cards or declare you are going to spare some trees this Christmas and not send any (gasp), be happy with the body you have and walk during your lunch break instead, have a system wherby everyone chips in during prepping and cooking time, give Santa some carrots instead (after all it's the reindeer we love really)....

We are the only ones who put the pressure on really. People can never make us feel anything- we choose how we think and act ourselves.

You may want to dismiss tradition this year or plan to for next year.

I know, how about you write down every single thing that you found irritating and stressful this year and then keep the list as a reminder of what not to do next time!

You will be way nicer to be around if you don't allow the stress to bring you down and cause you anxiety. You will smile more. You will be more relaxed and present. You will not be bothered by a burnt turkey or a lumpy bread sauce...You will just be watching from the sidelines with a smile on your face :)

Invite yourself to be joyful not woeful this Season!!!!!!

Imagine placing all the stresses in a big sack and throwing it in the dumpster xx

Creative Commons Picture by Axel Buhrmann

Floating to the surface

I do an exercise with my clients that involves them meditating (getting still) for just 5 minutes a day. What happens in this 5 minutes can open a gateway for the things we ultimately work on in the coaching sessions.

In this 5 minutes I ask them to just sit comfortably and get quiet, have a pencil and paper handy and literally just see what is "up there". What are the thoughts which come up again and again.

What ends up happening is what I liken to bubbles floating to the surface of water. Most of my clients will think about the usual stuff first. Their job, their career, their family, relationships then will come some unexpected stuff like things from the past, worry about the future and "nagging voices that don't shut up".

They wonder what on earth they are thinking some of this stuff for. Where does it come from?

I believe it comes from the subconscious mind. Whilst we may be consciously aware of many things, our subconscious mind is the mind which takes over when you are having a great conversation with someone whilst driving and then you get to your destination with almost no recollection of actually driving there (hey, it happens).

When we still our brain by becoming mindful and present to the thoughts, the stuff we have literally been ignoring and stuffing down for possibly years floats right back to the surface. It has always been there (like our beliefs) but we have cloaked it and covered it up for fear of what it might bring out into the open.

However, if you bring it out, hold it gently in your hands and examine it as you would with a newborn, you'll find that it may have ten fingers and toes yet no mouth to speak. You may have been holding it under for so long but when you give yourself the gift of dealing with it, your life may change for the better.

I have known people in the past who, when examined things that had been keeping them unhappy and unfulfilled for years, broke up challenging relationships, moved on from social situations no longer nourishing them and went on new adventures. Some where hard and fraught with tears and pain but ultimately ended in joy. This may not be the same for everyone, we may examine then choose something we perceive was the wrong thing but if we feel lighter, freer and peaceful then our inner wisdom has been heard.

That part of us that knows exactly what we need to do but is held back by fear of what might happen.

Allowing things to float to the surface can be daunting but ask yourself what you are getting from ignoring something that could ultimately give you resentments and regret.

I am running a Beginner's Meditation Course in Wellington NZ every Wednesday from 25th January 2012. Will you come be quiet with me?

Details here

Here’s what I know to be true

Here’s what I know to be true:

That my eyes are blue

That my mouth is big

That my legs and arms are stronger than they’ve ever been

That I could spend all day in the arms of my husband

That I love the sunshine

That I can devour books as if they are going to be lost to me somehow

That I adore chocolate

That I love puppies (even when they become full grown Dogs)

That I love meditating

That I love exercise even more

That I am so very passionate about people living a life they love

That life is so precious and short so we shouldn’t F*c* it up

That I have a theme for each year of my life

That I dance crazily even when I know people might be watching

That I am completely in love with my husband

That I love lots

That I cuddle people probably more than they would like

That I can get really shitty when it is that time of the month

That I sometimes take my weaknesses out on other people

That my ego is dissolving more and more each day

That I am just me

Authentic, relaxed, content, upset, vulnerable

Love

Scrummy Granloa

I wanted to share this recipe with you. It was originally found here and I have adapted it a little to suit me and my Weightwatchers points (7 pro points per half cup). I only have half a cup in the morning and add some fruit and low-fat milk. It is simply delicious and scrummy and I really look forward to eating it before my workout!

So here it is:

I use these particular Oats but any quick-cooking oats will do. Spread 495 grams on 2 baking sheets. Bake for 10 minutes in 180 degrees celsius.

Then in a mixing bowl you want to add;

50 grams of Wheatgerm

55 grams of Raw Sugar (I use this one as it is low GI but you can use what you prefer)

I usually use 60 grams of raw crushed cashews but I was out today so I threw in some chopped Almonds and Brazil nuts (roughly 40 grams mixed).

50 grams of Sunflower Seeds. You can also add Pumpkin Seeds but they add more points for me so I don't add them.

35 grams of desiccated Coconut and 60 grams of Raisins (I finished all of mine so couldn't snap a pic...

Mix all of this together with a spoon or clean hands!

By this time your oats will be ready to come out of the oven. Shovel them into the bowl and mix again (you may want to use a spoon to stop your hands burning though :)

Then you want to add in:

30 grams of Coconut Oil

100 grams of Maple Syrup (the real maple syrup not that flavoured stuff)!!!

1/2 Teaspoon of Vanilla Extract (I add this into the Maple Syrup)

Mix it all and try to get most of the mixture a little coated in the coconut oil and syrup.

Place on the baking sheets and pop back in the oven for 10 minutes. Please be careful and watch it though as my first ever batch got a little burnt in 8 minutes. Fine the second time though after about 9 and a half minutes.

Allow it to cool then transfer to a container for storage.

I usually have mine with:

& A dusting of healthy cinnamon.....

I do hope you enjoy this delicious nutritious breakfast, I know me and my husband do.

Let me know if you tried it!! ♥

An Ethical Nudge

We are reading more and more about ethical business.

We are becoming ethical consumers. At least I hope we are.

A business whose products and services are made ethically with minimal harm to people, animals and the environment.

Would you want to purchase from anywhere else?

I know I wouldn’t.

I am proud to be a positive buyer. If its cruelty-free (I‘m vegetarian), recycled, organic, biodynamic, fair trade or re-used then chances are it will be in my basket. I shop at Commonsense Organics here in Wellington and I try to get most of my fresh produce from the market (locally grown). Sometimes the need to go to New World (a supermarket) is required though!

I became a vegetarian again at 32 (I was one from ages 12-18) because I could simply not be so two-faced as to state that LOVE is my highest value and then dig into a bloody steak or make a vat of chili with mincemeat.

I do however (and I am so ashamed to admit this) still occasionally wear my leather jacket!!!! I know it is awful and yet it is one jacket that seems to go well with lots of different outfits.

Does this make me a fraud? Don’t answer that…

So we are becoming more aware of who to do business with and who to avoid like the plague.

For 2012 I would like to know more about how I can buy more ethically and I would urge you to do some digging too.

If we all move from cruelty to cruelty-free and caged to free range then we can take a step in an ethical direction.

I’ll have to re-think the leather jacket…

Photo above Creative Commons: Andy Roberts Photos

Clearing the Space

So I am clearing the space today for my writing month...

I am pondering whether or not I am simply putting some more space between now and when I begin to write.

I love writing, adore it and I do not do enough of it.

Sometimes I like the non-doing. Is what I imagine in my head going to come out right? I may be because I like a clean slate before I begin a new project so I am giving myself this one day. This one day to tidy up files on my mac, to file away other projects, to sort out 3 boxes in the corner of my home office which have been waiting patiently for me, to listen to many a podcast (on my playlist for some time), to put in order which books I want to read next on my kindle (I know this sounds pretty weird but hey it pleases me).

The words will simply have to wait patiently in me until tomorrow or perhaps I will do what I always do and wake in the middle of the night with them flying around me!

There is nothing better than a freshly clean desk with a bunch of flowers sitting on it and my pad, pen and laptop looking up at me with anticipation.

What will she write? Will she pour out her heart? Will she be real and true? How long will it take? Will anyone read it? Will it be published and if so by whom? Will it sell? Will it change someone's life? Will it give someone hope and comfort?

Lots of questions can arise and many will go unanswered for now. Before something can be real it must first be imagined...imagined and then worked towards with an air of surrender and from a place of vulnerability.

Nothing's gonna bring me down

This happy tune is sure to uplift you this Friday...the gorgeous Paolo Nutini doing his acoustic version of Pencil Full of Lead!!

Have a dance and ENJOY :)

Push gently

When we begin to move out of the confines of our limited thinking mind great and wonderful opportunities can appear.

I was one of those people who started out my business in Australia a few years back and thought everyone would just come to me. Why wasn't the phone ringing off the hook? Why was I not attracting these amazing clients I so wished to see succeed in life?

Was it maybe because I was sitting in my home office expecting everyone would know about me?

Yes actually, it was. Yes, that was me. I felt sad and unloved and rejected..by whom I have no idea. They, I guess. Those "they" people we all talk about. If you have met this "they" can you please tell them from me that "they" suck??

It took a lot of courage for me but when I started off my business here in NZ back in June, I was told by my coach that I needed to push outside of that comfort zone and start talking to people.

It was so scary for me. I love chatting with people but I thought I had to be all business like and serious and wear a suit for people to relate to me.

You know what though...? I actually didn't have to.

I found that by just being myself and truly remaining authentic (one of my highest values) the right people came into my life, the right doors are opening and whilst I do not have a hugely successful business yet, I continue to believe it will only be a matter of time :)

So I guess my message is this: if you stay within the confines of your limited thinking and comfort zone you will continue to remain there but if you gently push the walls a little, poke and prod them who knows what might happen. Gosh, maybe even your dreams could become a reality...imagine that....the possibilities are endless cause I tell you what...When you push and grow even a little the comfort zone gets bigger and then you think...hmmm I did that and now I feel comfortable- what else might happen if I push further.

So instead of feeling boxed, squashed and unloved like I did, push past the walls of your own making and peek into the world with a fresh set of eyes, rub away the past and smile into your future!

R.E.S.P.E.C.T

"Respect denotes both a positive feeling of esteem for a person or other entity" Wikipedia

We all want to feel respected right? Am I right?

I believe so.

In the working world I hear so many people say that they in no way whatsoever feel respected in their workspace.

Where has respect gone? Did it vanish? If so, how do we get it back? Do you respect yourself? If not, why not?

So we spend most of our days working. This is a fact for many of us.

If we work in a team environment the chances are we are working with other human beings.

If we work with other human beings, chances are that we interact with them in some way almost every single day. Even if it's just to ask them to pass the stapler.

Chances are when respect is lacking or absent for ourselves and others, problems can occur.

Problems by the names of hostility, irritability, sarcasm and suspicion.

Hmmm those don't sound very nice. From my experience this can lead to workplace conflicts, bullying, paranoia, frustration, low morale, decreased productivity, negativity and a whole other host of nasty things.

So imagine if you worked somewhere where they respected one another. You respected yourself and your team members, your manager and your clients.

So chances are when respect is present and around the workspace will be peaceful, calm, positive and nice.

Ahhh that sounds much better. From my experience this can lead to workplace harmony, inclusion, relaxation, increased morale, increased productivity, positivity and a whole host of other nice things.

So how do we foster a respectful workplace?

Here are some suggestions to show respct for others and for yourself:

Be Compassionate to others- embodying kindness and genuine compassion which is defined as a deep awareness of the suffering of another with the wish to decrease it.

Be Understanding- truly listen to other people and don't just fill the space with talk and think you know what they are going to say. Practice being quiet and letting someone really talk and don't feel you need to fix everything but be that support for someone else.

Be Empathetic- this kind of goes hand in hand with compassion. Recognise when others are suffering and share feelings with them without getting too involved and taking on their suffering.

Be Mindful- Think before you speak. Ask yourself what benefit what you are about to say brings. If it is not kind and not helpful keep your mouth closed.

Be a Conscious Communicator- Interact authentically with those around you. Be honest and open and do what you say you are going to do.

All of these things will go some way to promote a less stressful working environment and encourage respect in your workspace.

It all starts with you...

Create Your Own

Creating your own map takes courage.

I can read an awful lot of business type books and apply what I learned.

Or I can take the wisdom, pick the pieces that work for me and place the rest gently down for someone else to pick up.

Or I can simply read what others are doing and then laugh as I go about failing and succeeding in my own unique way.

Sometimes I feel a slight pressure when I look at all the amazing things happening out there in the world. People are doing awesome things, really astounding and creative and brilliant things.

Sometimes I hear a voice in my head asking me (it is gentle) hey, when are you going to come up with something astounding, amazing and brilliant?

You know what I hear myself answer...I may and I may not!

When I hear that I can sometimes feel defeated but I know that inside me my map is just waiting patiently to be drawn.

The pencils are there, the paper is fresh and hasn't yet felt the beauty of creation. It is ready and waiting and all I have to do is pick up the utensils, set my mind to create and begin.

Gosh though, it's a challenge sometimes...so it is....

My November and December are going to be all about getting my book complete. My own unique work of art that has been patiently waiting for me to be ready to finish it...

I say finish because I have actually began....many many times and always managed to tell myself that it wasn't the right time.

Yet now I wake up in the middle of the night with the most wonderful passages that linger on the edges of my dreams and speak at first in whispers then in a clear voice...so clear that I can no longer ignore or push aside with comments such as "Hmmm, maybe, but not yet."

The time is now and I wonder what project or creation your uniqueness will bring to light.

If we don't just go ahead with it, the voice will only get louder and the map will remain undrawn and wouldn't that be sad.

I once read something on a wall in Byron Bay and it ended:

"life is never really that tragic so start smiling and spread the magic."

Can you begin to spread your magic even if it's just a few words or pictures on a fresh sheet?